Prepping for the Doctor
Since my last doctor’s visit, I have had three months to psych myself out and turn myself into a quivering mass of “I don’t want to go” because, frankly, when it comes to people telling me that what I have done isn’t good enough… Well, call that one of my buttons. Press it a couple times and you’ll probably make me cry. Keep pressing it and you’ll never see me again.
The last appointment was a hard hit for me. I came in expecting a ‘good effort’ on something I’d worked hard for and instead I ended up with a ‘that’s not good enough’. The whole thing messed with my head and made me feel down for weeks.
After talking to my husband about it – repeatedly – I have come to realize that I have to stand up for myself. I know, simple lesson, but it’s easier said than done. I keep forgetting that these people aren’t actually a be all and end all authority in my life. They are there to help me, and if I am not satisfied, I can switch to another doctor.
Strange how long it takes some people to learn the little things, huh?
What it all comes down to is that I have a choice if need be and I shouldn’t let anyone knock me down for being proud of something. What is awesome for me is awesome for me. Period.
Now if only I didn’t have to talk to myself so much just to be able to tolerate going to the doctor.
Yay team social anxiety!
May 15th, 2009 at 5:16 am
Hope this visit goes well! I haven’t been to a doctor in years and don’t intend to go unless I’m bleeding profusely from a terrible wound!
May 15th, 2009 at 5:19 am
Oh, I avoid my GP with anything until it starts seriously interfering with my work. This, at least, is at the reproductive service section of the women’s clinic, so it’s more specific towards my babymaking goals/health.