Finally Getting Fit

As part of my new dieting scheme, I have to eat smaller portions every three hours (maximum). As someone who loves food, you would think that would be an incredibly awesome turn of events. Even with the restricted diet and smaller portions… That’s a lot of eating during the day.

Strangely enough, that is what I am – so far – struggling with the most.

Mind you, figuring out dinners that I can eat and my husband will enjoy hasn’t exactly been a walk in the park, but eating every two or three hours is hard!

The thing about the way I used to be is that I would usually eat a little something for breakfast and then completely forget to eat until my husband got home. That sounds nice and all, but it definitely didn’t encourage any weight loss in me.

I have alarms set on my computer to remind me to eat, and it’s a good thing I do because I would never remember otherwise. It’s hard for me to not just ‘dismiss’ them most of the time and not eat.

The problem with that is I have to eat small portions this often because the naturopath is trying to balance out my blood sugar. Unfortunately, it’s only been serving to make me a bit grumpy (which could just be TOM) and I have no idea how my blood sugar is doing.

This week I’m just trying to get my body used to the times and the food. Next week I’ll work on being even more strict with the portions so hopefully I’ll actually want to eat as often as I’m supposed to.

You know you’re in for a hard time when your naturopath/doctor tells you to enjoy yourself this weekend because the next six weeks are going to be hard…

You know you’re in for a hard time when your naturopath/doctor tells you to enjoy yourself this weekend because the next six weeks are going to be hard…

Today, as I have been waiting to for weeks now, I finally got to go to the naturopath. The ‘one hour consultation’ turned into a two-hour session that was very thorough and left me feeling pleased with all the information I have to work with.

First things first, I highly recommend that each and every one of you go and get allergy testing. There were things I was eating that are ‘healthy’ and that I love, but it turns out those things are not good for me at all. Sulfur was a big surprise in the negative reactions. What does that mean? For the next six weeks (until I get tested again) beans and a bunch of other things are a no-go.

Anyway, I went in and did a bunch of testing to find out that even though I’ve been eating much healthier than I used to, my systems are still quite out of balance. She double-checked and even tripled-checked some things to make sure that they were working right and that I understood what the reactions meant.

I am so glad I was recommended to that clinic. I have never had someone be that thorough. We talked about everything that is going on, has gone on, my family history, my insides, my outside (skin and hair), and I even got the chance to test whatever foods I wanted.

Right now, it’s a bit of an information overload. I know some foods I have to cut out straight off – dairy, mushrooms, beans, deli meat, sweets – but I have yet to get to the nitty gritty of planning out menus.

Yep, it’s come to what I never thought I would do – planning each and every meal. It’s going to be an interesting six weeks! I’m starting on Monday with my first weigh in and whatnot.

I’m a little scared… Hehe.

Yesterday I confessed to the fact that I don’t trust myself to have chocolate in the house with me when I’m alone during the day. After having a talk with my husband, I began to realize just how big of a part psychology is playing in my weight loss (or lack of weight loss).

I know that I have the common lack of confidence that runs rampant among overweight people, but beyond that, I’m a bit clueless and thus a bit clueless as to how to approach things to make them better.

The thing about it is I know when it started. I actually remember one of the first (if not THE) first time I ate until my stomach hurt so, so badly. I was a child then. And now, though I can blame my weight and all the other fun things that come along with it on PCOS, the psychological fixtures remain.

And I don’t know what to do about them.

When do you hit the point when you need to go talk to a professional? Does it even really need to go that far?

The problem is I don’t know where to start. I just plain can’t keep up with food journaling. I have so much going on in my mind that I always forget about it. But then again, maybe that’s the key and I need to start kicking my arse into gear that way.

Maybe I need to explore my true feelings through journaling. Or maybe…

I just don’t know.

How have you faced the psychological side of your weight? Has it been a problem or not much to think about for you?

Tonight my husband asked me – and I can’t remember the segue into it – how I was going with all the ‘weight loss stuff’ and when I was planning to ‘get back into it’. We talked a bit about how I had stuck hardcore to the South Beach diet earlier this year but that had tapered off into not so hardcore but still sticking to most of the basic principles.

While I am more than happy to admit that the lack of progress (losing pounds) doesn’t take long to get to me, I told my husband that I was trying to ‘be good’ until I got to the naturopath appointment (which was scheduled for Monday but got rescheduled to August 1st (grr)) and they could tell me how to fix things.

However, (I went on) if I had to be really honest with myself, I think a lot of my problems come from the psychological side of things. I get daily emails from very weight loss/fitness support groups, and most of the time they ask questions. “What are you getting from being fat?” “What foods are you addicted to? Why?” “What are you giving yourself when you binge and how you can replace that behavior?”

They might not have all been those questions verbatim, but that does pretty much cover it. And the frustrating thing, to me, is that I don’t know. I don’t know what being fat is giving me that causes me to self-sabotage. I don’t know why I still can’t trust myself with chocolate in the house.

Yes, folks, that’s the sad reality. I received a bunch of chocolate from a friend who lives overseas and I just plain don’t trust myself to have it in the house with me when I’m alone during the day…

I was recently talking to a friend about a tense situation she was in the middle of with one of her family members. I remembered back to when my family situation got so bad that I ended up cutting ties and moving across the world.

The thing is people tend to not like change – especially when they are benefiting from things staying the same. In my friend’s case, her family member benefitted from being in control of her. It’s when my friend started standing up for herself and not obeying the whims of the family member that things started getting a little sticky.

The same sort of thing happened in my case when I started trying to stand up for myself and become my own woman. And the same thing can happen to you when you’re trying to lose weight.

Whether you’re the ‘fat friend’ to skinnier people or friends/family with people around your size, you could be giving friends or family benefits you don’t realize you’re giving them.

In the case of the former, having the ‘fat friend’ around makes the others look better. In the latter, people may feel more comfortable around you because they feel like they can eat whatever they want.

When you start changing and getting fit, you may be met with smiles on the outside but also a bit of negative energy in addition.

Whether or not they realize they are doing it – often they won’t realize it and will deny such behavior – you need to take stock of what is really important. If getting fit is important to you, you might need to make some tough decisions.

Have you had to make tough decisions in regards to influences on your fitness journey?

I was raised with the belief that cravings are an okay thing. Obey them because if you are craving something, that meant there is something in the food you’re craving that your body needs. However, when I got older and people talked about craving foods that were less than ideal for them, I began to think that cravings were a little more than what I’d been told.

I decided to do a little research because I have not been able to get enough yogurt lately. However, I’ve also been feeling sick to my stomach off and on, which may or may not be caused by being lactose intolerant. So, in theory, if cravings truly are what I was raised to believe, I should be able to replace the yogurt with something else that will give me what my body needs…

According to WebMD, “Surveys estimate that almost 100% of young women and nearly 70% of young men had food cravings during the past year. That covers most of us, doesn’t it?”

Well it’s certainly good to know that I’m not alone! But what does that mean exactly?

According to this article, food cravings pretty much are mostly in your head. Take away the pregnancy cravings side of things, and you’re most likely craving things because you want to calm down, comfort yourself, or are addicted to what you’re craving.

If you’re struggling with food cravings, read the article. It has seven facts about cravings and well as ideas on how to deal with them

As for me, I’m not too worried about yogurt cravings but will be taking a break from it nonetheless so I can see if I’m lactose intolerant.

And you shouldn’t be worried if you’re craving healthy foods. Just take things in moderation.

Even though I no longer live in the United States, that doesn’t mean I have forgotten about one of the biggest traditions held there.

Celebrating the Fourth of July!

As with more holidays, food is a huge part of this celebration. With potato salad, hot dogs, grandma’s pies and all kinds of other goodies, it’s easy to overload and be groaning at the end of the night instead of ‘oooing’ and ‘ahhing’ when the fireworks are going off.

I’m not here to warn you to be careful about eating too much, though. If you’re going to do it, you’re going to do it. You know the consequences and only you will know how you will feel tomorrow morning.

No, I’m here to talk about the interesting benefits of one of the traditional fourth of July celebration foods: Watermelon!

If you haven’t heard the news, it turns out this tasty little fruit has a lot more going for it than a sweet demeanor and seeds that are fun to spit all over the place.

As it turns out, watermelon might be the new aphrodisiac on the ‘makes you hot’ list.

Scientists say that watermelons pack an interesting punch for you blood vessels and very well could increase your libido. Not only that, but there is a large list of other health benefits too.

The unfortunate part of this whole thing is that I don’t like watermelons. Back to oysters and green M&Ms for me.

Have a safe, happy, and fun holiday to those who are celebrating.

One of the big reasons I am trying to lose weight is because I want to have as healthy of a pregnancy as I can. While having a baby isn’t in my close financial future, that just means I have more time to work with when it comes to losing weight.

I haven’t gotten on the scale for a couple weeks now, and I’m a bit nervous about the possible ‘damage’ I may have done by not weighing in. Despite that, the worry I feel about that is nothing compared to the stress and depression I was dealing with before, so I’m still glad that I went off the scale for right now.

Towards the end of next month, I have an appointment to see a doctor. I’m both excited and nervous about this appointment because it could mean changes in a lot of ways. I’m hoping to find out why I have such a hard time losing weight. I’m hoping that she’ll make changes to my diet that will help me get even healthier. I’m also hoping that the appointment will be a turning point.

I want to be a mother so badly, but I am afraid that whatever is going on with my body is going to prevent that dream from coming true. I know a lot of women with PCOS (I’m not 100% sure I have PCOS, by the way) just have to lose a little weight and then they get pregnant, but therein lies the problem.

So I guess you can consider me on a bit of a hiatus (though I’ll still be posting) until I go to that appointment and find out what’s going on.

Wish me lots of luck and patience.

I received an email today that linked to a page (it was just a question, so no link) that asked:

“What does overeating and being overweight giving you?”

I was a bit puzzled about the question at first until I realized it was the basic question of why overeat. And I haven’t stopped thinking about it all morning.

When I first started my weight loss journey, it was easy to figure out why I overate. I was abused as a child and shut down a lot of myself and my personality. I used to eat as much food as I could get my hands on until I would ache with being full. It was my way of feeling something without the fear of having something bad happen because of my feelings. I could eat until I hurt and no one would know it but me.

I’m in a much better place now with much better circumstances. Those reasons no longer apply, so it was a bit harder to think of what I was getting from being fat.

These days, I think food being a comfort thing plays a big part in things. I was betrayed and hurt by people I trusted with my life from an early age, so it’s very hard for me to trust people. Food has never betrayed my trust and has never failed to be there.

So that’s the food side of it, but what about the being overweight?

For right now, you’re guess is pretty much as good as mine. I think part of me thinks that fat equals unattractive equals safe as far as men goes, but I feel like I’m still missing a key element that will answer the question better.

So, what does overeating and being overweight give you?

…or rather, sleep to be fit.

It may sound like a bunch of silly nattering, but getting adequate amounts of sleep is an important part of losing weight. Cammy over at Tippy Toe Diet talked about sleep and weight loss on her blog recently – linking to this Web MD article – and talked a bit about toning down her late night activities.

What I’m wondering is can you have too much sleep? Does it hinder your weight loss if you sleep too much?

For the first year of our relationship, my husband and I lived thousands of miles apart. I was used to the university lifestyle, though, so staying up until three in the morning (when he got home from work) and talking to him until about seven (when I had to get ready for class on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays) wasn’t a big deal to me. After moving to Australia, I reignited my love for sleep.

I can go to bed about ten or ten thirty at night and wake up between eight and nine. I don’t because I’m at the gym by seven thirty each morning, but I most definitely could.

So, logically, combined with a good diet and exercise, I should have been shedding off the pounds. Even now with getting up early for the gym, I am clocking between eight and nine hours a night. (Don’t hate me because I sleep more than you do. Hehe.)

But, of course, I haven’t. I’m considering going into a coma for a fortnight to test things out a bit more. What do you think?

If you’re having trouble sleeping, Cammy has some excellent tips to help you get the sleep you need.

Yawning and probably flirting heavily with the thought, “Maybe I could just skip today…” Having successfully gotten yourself out of bed, now it’s time to get dressed even though the bed seems to be calling your name… You are finally outside or at the gym, and now it’s tempting to just do a short workout instead of a regular one… Time to get exercising…

It’s often quite hard in itself to get yourself exercising, let alone sticking to a routine. Because of this, an injury might be a relief to you mentally, but it can be devastating to you workout routine. Any injury sees you with the possibility of not getting back into exercising after you have healed.

The best way to keep yourself from giving in to giving up is to stay as active as you can even when you are injured. Doing that is easier said than done…

Here are a few ways you can exercise even if you have injured a part of your body:

*Do stretches. Stretching is a great form of exercise that often feels so, so good.

*Concentrate on what you can move. If you have injured your upper body, do exercises with your lower body, and vice versa.

*Try new small exercises. There are foot and hand exercises, neck exercises, ankle exercises… Start doing some investigating to see just how much you can do.

*Remember that everything counts. From tapping your toes to tightening and then loosening your muscles repeatedly, every little bit can help – even if you are keeping up the mental aspects of exercising regularly.

After a heart to heart with my husband yesterday, I feel the need to clarify a few things about my decision yesterday.

I have decided not to weigh in on the scale. That’s it. I’m not quitting exercising, not quitting eating right, and certainly am not heading out to have a big binge of my naughty little food addictions. All I’m doing is just not stepping on the scale for a month so I can clear out my head space.

I am currently trying to get myself in a better place mentally and emotionally. I believe that accepting and loving myself as I am will help inspire me to want to make myself healthier. While I am doing that a lot, I could still stand to improve. At this time, though, I feel like I’m being hindered by stepping on the scale – not helped.

I need to be doing this for me. I can keep going doing it for other people, and that’s okay, but if I’m not doing it for myself, I’m not in the right place mentally. Gains hurt too much and plateaus are too frustrating when I have this subconscious need to be making someone else happy.

So no scale for June! But keeping on with diet and exercise.

Having said that, I am already feeling better without the scale and numbers hanging over my head. (Not literally. I keep the scale on the floor in the bedroom.) Of course, now I’m curious to see how much I weigh, but I think that just comes with no longer being required to weigh in.

It feels great! I’m doing my healthy thang and feeling good.

And that’s all it should really be about in the end.

It’s a long holiday weekend here in Oz, so I slept in and had the pleasure of doing so next to my husband. Not having to deal with the alarm and having the husband home, it wasn’t until after I took a shower that I realized it is Monday. I dried myself with the towel and though, “Oh, Monday. That means weigh in.”

But as I got dressed and prepared to start work for the day (someday I’ll take a real holiday), I thought about how I have been feeling about losing weight lately. I thought about how I have been closer to just giving up completely, for good, than I have ever been. Yes, I’ve fallen off the wagon before, but never have I wanted to purposely just stop.

I also thought about an email I received over the weekend from my lovely friend Jenera. In the email, she said:

“I’ve taken breaks in weight loss (and life) before and it really helps. You might just need to take the next month to focus on YOU-not your body, just you. I know it helps me quite a bit. I think if you keep up with the exercise, still eat healthy, and have the hubby hide the scale, you might be able to refocus a bit and not be too hard on yourself. The fact that you’ve been sticking with the positive changes is a huge accomplishment!”

And she’s right. I have been so focused on numbers, pounds, losing weight, that I have lost focus on me, JM, the person inside. I have been slowly turning myself into someone who judges myself based on my looks instead of based on the beautiful person I know I am.

So for the entire month of June, I’m hiding the scale. Whether it turns out to be a bad or good thing in terms of pounds, I don’t care. I need to focus on me, take care of me, and remember why I started getting fit in the first place.

I have been thinking a lot lately about why I am losing weight and why I want to continue to try to do so. Back when I first started seriously getting into dieting, I had a while to go before my wedding. I already had the dress and it was too big, so I would need it to get fitted anyway. Of course I wanted to lose weight for the wedding.

Here are a few tips and tricks in case you’re looking to do the same thing from someone who did it.

*Start early. It is always better to work in the healthy habits as soon as possible. That also makes it easier if you have a ‘bad’ day to recover afterward.

*Get your whole wedding party in on it. You shouldn’t make it a requirement for everyone in the wedding to lose weight, but it can be great to have that support from anyone who wants to participate.

*Plan ahead. For your pre-wedding parties, plan ahead and request healthier food and snacks.

*Always remember the dress/tux. If you’re going to be losing a significant amount of weight, be sure to have an appointment not long before the wedding to get the dress fitted.

*Most importantly: Don’t let it spoil the day. If you haven’t lost as much as you would have liked, it’s okay! It’s your day and no one is going to be thinking about your weight.

I know this is a little different from my usual posting, but I hope some people find it useful.

There is nothing like a good reminder of why you’re on a quest to improve your health. I got one of those reminders last night.

I have completely taken rice out of my diet because of how it makes me tired. I’ve kicked pasta and now use bean curd noodles. I have had rye bread in the last couple of days, but I have otherwise kicked out bread. The same goes for potatoes.

All in all, I have made a lot of positive changes for my diet in response to the insulin resistance side effects I was having before.

But I dropped my guard last night.

My husband and I went out to eat last night and I ordered an extra bowl of veggies on the side. When it comes to craving things that are good for me, I obey my cravings. My meal already came with some veggies, but I had a desperate craving for broccoli and, well…

The veggies in my meal included two small potatoes. Now, I haven’t had potatoes for a few months now. Time obviously liberally dusted my mind with ‘forget potion’ because I figured I’d give the potatoes a go and see how it went. I wasn’t sure if I’d actually react to them or not.

Well, I did.

Potatoes don’t knock me out with quite the force rice does, but those two little spuds were certainly the next best thing. About five minutes after we finished eating, I was yawning and ready for bed.

Why do I always have to test things? Why can’t I just leave things alone when I’m told no? Bleh. Ah well. I have been well and truly reminded why I don’t eat potatoes. (Or rice, or pasta, or…)

How about you? Are you insulin resistant or battling other factors that make getting fit that much more difficult?